During that period of time, I guess I worked too much in a virtual world that I did not know how to return to the real world. Silly me, I was being a fool and believed the impossible. I thought miracle would happen but no, it only happens in the virtual world. No matter how and what I did, there ain’t miracle.
Consequently, I had always had this depressing aura released that my close friends started to feel awkward around me. I was very well aware of that that I started to avoid them: I did not hang around much them like I used to.
It was until that night when I could not take it longer. That was harsh. Each and every word pierced through my heart. No doubt, that text was a good closure. It was harsh but, at the same time, good.
I cried every night to sleep since that incident and as far as I believe, that night was the last night I cried to sleep.
Fortunately, I did not have to go to work the next day as it was still a holiday. For the whole day, I spent time with myself and tried so hard to focus only me, myself and I: What do I want? What I do not want? What do I like? What do I dislike? What makes me smile? What makes me cry? What will make me happy? And what will make me unhappy?
I literally forgot who I am.
I forgot me.