Chapter 2 (Part II): Women, Give Up Giving Advice!

The most common mistake women make in relationships:

A woman tries to change a man’s behaviour when he makes mistakes by becoming the home-improvements committee and offering unsolicited advice or criticism.

Therefore, this leads to the most frequently expressed complaint men have about women is that women are always trying to change them.

When a woman loves a man she feels responsible to assist him in growing and tries to help him improve the way he does things. She forms a home-improvement committee and he becomes her primary focus.

No matter how much he resists her help, she persists – waiting for any opportunity to help him or tell him what to do. She thinks she’s nurturing him while he feels he’s being controlled.

Instead, he wants her acceptance.

When a woman offers unsolicited advice or tries to “help” a man, she has no idea of how critical and unloving she may sound to him.

Even though her intent is loving, her suggestions do offend and hurt.

For many men, it is very important to prove that they can get to their goal. men pride themselves on being experts, especially when it comes to fixing mechanical things, getting places or solving problems. These are the times when he needs her loving acceptance the most and not her advice or criticism.

Try challenging yourself to practise restraining from giving any unsolicited advice or criticism.

The men in your life not only will appreciate it but also will be more attentive and responsive to you.

 

Extracted from Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Pantai Kerachut@Taman Negara Pulau Pinang

It was one of the weekends where my colleagues and I decided to do something different together; we went hiking at Penang National Park! It has been a long time since I last hiked. The last time I did it was Broga Hill.

However, what makes this two trips different is that I did not stay awake until 2AM and hiked in the dark.

Also, the slopes and the journey was not as difficult as compared to Broga Hill.

Another difference is that there is no bridge or water at Broga Hills. There are four peaks at Broga Hills and you are surrounded by other hills too.

Merometic Lake

Hiking at Penang National Park gives you another type of journey to reach either Monkey Beach or Kerachut Beach. We chose Kerachut Beach. Not only that, you got to see Merometic Lake as well.

Kerachut Beach is a place where turtles breed as well. Therefore, there is a Turtle Conservation Centre where you can see baby turtles under proper care, I guess.

You can hike all the way to Kerachut Beach and then take the boat back to the save point. However, remember to make a reservation of the boat which only cost you RM80 at the jetty. Else, it will cost you RM120 if you are getting the boat from the beach.

Some of my colleagues decided to hike back to the jetty while just a few of us were taking the boat back. Taking a boat back is not a cowardly action. Instead, it is another type of exciting experience. I kid you not. The bumpy rides, you must give it a try!

Chapter 2 (Part I): Men, Learn to Listen!

The most common mistake men make in relationships:

A man tries to change a woman’s feelings when she is upset by becoming Mr. Fix-It and offering solutions to her problems that invalidate her feelings.

Therefore, this leads to the most frequently expressed complaint women have about men is that men don’t listen.

Either a man completely ignores her when she speaks to him, or he listens for a few beats, assesses what is bothering her and then proudly puts on his Mr. Fix-It cap and offers her a solution to make her feel better.

However, she continues to be upset. His solution is being rejected and he feels increasingly useless. He is confused when she doesn’t appreciate this gesture of love.

She wants empathy, but he thinks she wants solutions.

He has no idea that by just listening with empathy and interest he can be supportive.

He does not know that talking about problems is not an invitation to offer a solution.

Men need to remember that women talk about problems to get close and not necessarily to get solutions.

You see, women never offer solutions when someone is talking. A way for honoring another woman is to listen patiently with empathy, seeking truly to understand the other’s feelings.

Try challenging yourself to practise listening whenever a woman speaks, with the sole intention of respectfully understanding what she is going through. Practise biting your tongue whenever you get the urge to offer a solution or change how she is feeling.

You will be surprised when you experience how much she appreciates you.

 

Extracted from Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

Food Review@Restoran Sri Ananda Bahwan

It was after work when my colleagues wanted to go for a food adventure. We wanted to go to Passion of Kerala at New World Park but it was closed. Therefore, we walked to Old Town Kopitiam and sat for a while before we left again to the next place, Sri Ananda Bahwan Restaurant at Tanjung Bungah. There were a lot of expats there though and the Indian waiters there speak really good English.

I ordered Mango Lassi. It is a cross between a smoothie and a milk shake and is smooth and creamy. Lassi is a popular and traditional yogurt-based drink of the Indian subcontinent. I actually wanted to order some common drinks but my colleague suggested that since we are at an Indian restaurant, why not order some Indian-ish beverage.

As for my main, I ordered Nasi Beriani Kambing and guess what? It was lovely! The dish was really good. Though it came in big portion, I still managed to finish it.

My colleague really loves the restaurant’s Masala Chicken and finally she managed to have it. However, luck was not on her side. She had food poisoning the next day. I guess either the chicken or the gravy was not fresh at point of time but, I do not think it happens that often.

Chapter One: Remembering the Differences

Love is magical and it can last if we remember our differences.

Through understanding the hidden differences of the opposite sex, we can more successfully give and receive the love that is in our hearts.

Then, by validating and accepting our differences, creative solutions can be discovered whereby we can succeed in getting what we want.

More importantly, we can learn how to best love and support the people we care about most.

 

Extracted from Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

A Weekend in Kuala Lumpur!

Was down in Kuala Lumpur during one of the weekends in April. It was our second time to took a bus but this time, we took Aeroline. We reached Corus Hotel but walked over to KLCC for lunch. His sister picked him up while Mun picked me up. They went to City Centre while I went to Subang Jaya straight.

I had been missing Sushi Zanmai so we went to Sunway Pyramid after we got our egg tarts in SS15. Once we were there, spotted, Ken with his favourite girl. I also bumped into Fang when we were leaving the place. To be honest, it feels good to be back as I have more friends in Kuala Lumpur compared to in Penang. Mun dropped me at IOI Mall and KS picked me up, thought to have dinner with my brother but he was busy. His sister then picked me up from Taman Desa and we finally headed home, knackered.

Day two came really early as we had to wake up earlier than our usual weekends. Therefore, it had been a long time since we had breakfast together. We then headed to Bandar Utama where Ikea, The Curve and One Utama are. I met a few friends at One Utama before I had to go Tropicana to meet the Point One Bu.

When hanging out with them, no doubt we will have a late night. We were supposed to drink, more, but due to us focusing more on this card game, no one was knocked out. Anyway, since we have someone waited for us at home, Bu was kind enough to drive us back. Really grateful but at the same time, worried that he could not find his way out.

Day three was the day we were supposed to catch our flight back to Penang. His sister’s boyfriend drove us to Sunway Pyramid after we had our late breakfast as well as had our luggage packed.

We had our lunch at The Street Café. The food was good. Should try Street Raboki and Kimbap and Buchimgae.

Look at those chocolates. Those were given by one of my girl friends who just came back from Australia. Not all are mine though, two packets are for Jess but till now, I had not passed them to her yet.

I was really worn out when we landed Penang but guess what? The boyfriend was still very determined to look for a pair of basketball shoes. We went to Queensbay Mall straight and my oh my, I bought a few things for myself too. I was hoping these will motivate me even more to go to gym but obviously, epic fail!

When They Were Here!

I know this was long time ago but I guess I slacked a lot to update my blog regularly. So, who where here in Penang? They were not other than my course mates from Kuala Lumpur, Mun and Kuan. I used to do group assignments with them in Accounting and Finance respectively. They were in Penang on Friday night but I brought them around on Monday when they were leaving on Tuesday.

Monday is not a good day in Penang. Most of the stalls are all closed on Mondays. Therefore, I brought them to Pulau Tikus for brunch. New World Park came later. There were more variety food available at that place. I wanted them to try Ken’s favourite tom yam noodles but it was the soup tom yam noodles instead. Though the taste was there, it was not as good as dry tom yam noodles. And Mun found her favourite stall that serves Chinese desserts or appetizers. No idea what the dishes’ names are.

With a lot of eating, I drove them to Straits Quay. Well, they were there the night before but I wanted them to be there again during daytime. To have a different feel of the place. Knackered, we decided to rest at Kaffa Kaffe. Kuan was eyeing on this place when they first went there. Relaxed and had some drinks before we left for dinner at Northam Beach Café.

Behold the food above we ordered at Northam Beach Café. I think there were more. We were already eating while waiting for Ying to join us after she finished working.

Since it rained heavily a while ago, there was this beautiful rainbow. Actually there were two but the second rainbow was not that solid. We had a great girlie night that night. Great talk on various topics. How I wish I could have this every week. This explains why I have always been looking forward for my friends to come to Penang!