Wednesday, April 6, 2011

How to Keep the Fire Burning in a Relationship

“First comes love, then comes marriage, then she comes with a baby carriage..” – a popular refrain, which does the rounds with friends when one of them falls in love.

coffee love

Every married couple feels that the fire seems to fade away as they grow old together. They fear a loss of value in each other’s life, fear the fact that their own beauty and sex appeal is fading and before we know it, many marriages went out of control. All such situations occur because we do not take stock of the situation ahead and have delusion that the romance will continue forever.

Therefore, before it gets too late, take stock of the situation and know how to keep the fire burning in a relationship.


Do Something New Today Together

Keep trying new things together is definitely one hellish way to not let the fire die in a relationship. That is the main reason why relationships have a lot of passion when they have just kicked off because of the fact that it is new and you are still discovering each other. But slowly, as time passes and this newness starts fading, you might begin to feel that the passion that kept both of you going is also fading along with it.

Therefore, it is very important to keep trying new activities together and experimenting with life, with each other and with our own lives to keep the fire burning.

A relationship that is always exciting and holds the element of newness and mystery in it is more likely to keep its spark.


Get Rid of The Extinguisher

When the fire seems to fade away or runs into one of the dangerous territories, anything and everything that can decrease the passion.

For instance, phone calls during dinner, conversations only centered around a period of financial crisis, reading the paper and not paying attention while one partner talks, complaining and nagging on the part of one partner and silent sulking on the part of another – these are all the things that act fire extinguishers that will put out the fire, in other word, passion!

Prepare for such mood dampeners from the beginning so that either you do not let them come between you or they only end up bringing you closer. Being prepared beforehand about certain situations will help in narrowing the divide or prevent it from occurring.


Space, Not Distance

You will run the risk of widening the gap if you do not allow enough space between the two of you and consequently, creates distances that can never be exceeded. It would definitely serve you well to lead separate social lives even as both of you live and share lives together. Relationships are meant to bring two people together but it should not pose a threat to anyone’s personal space, individuality and individual space to grow in relationships.

Never enter into a relationship with the intention of feeling complete but with the intention of sharing your life with someone worthy of your love, respect and concern.

When spouses allow each other space to grow and feel complete within themselves, the relationship reaches a level of maturity and trust that is matched by very few. And ultimately, you will need nothing to keep you together.


No comments: